Magnanimously homeschooling, worshiping, creating.......

Join us on a journey of faith, healing, learning to live with part of our hearts missing, and recovery, as our family rebuilds our lives, after our son's long battle with cancer....and his eventual rise on eagle's wings into Heaven...victory is his...he is serving the King!!!
Showing posts with label transplant journey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label transplant journey. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

new earth toned comfy blanket story





Today, I am starting a new crochet project.....a journey, a story that I want to share with you. All three of you. LOL!!  I am calling it my 'new earth toned comfy blanket.  

I love looking back at what I have done in my past.  I looked at all of my crochet blogging, wondering if I posted them all on here over the years of my hit and miss blogging. Well, here they are!!

 (Due to the nature of this particular post, it is a looong one, sorry)

MY CROCHET FUN

This contains the crochet projects of my past.  Not all of them, of coarse. I have been crocheting well before the days of blogging about them. I remember dreading going to school because I wanted to stay home and crochet some more.

Then there is Braveheart. Oh, how I crocheted, while nurturing our son, especially after his transplant and his long stay at the hospital. I have fond memories of teaching many a med student how to crochet. I believe at least one gal is still crocheting to this day. It took me a long time after Braveheart went to Heaven before I could pick it up again. I 'knew' in my heart, it was ok, and I knew B would understand and even smile about it with pleasure if he were here, but it was a mental thing. So tangible, like it was just not right. How could I pick this up without him??? But...now I did. I am ready and at peace with it. Now, it is a good memory, like time spent with this dear one, missed so...ooooh, so much and each time I pick it up, I am spending a moment with him.

Crocheting always reminds me of our boy, as do birds. I love crocheting in my cozy little sitting room upstairs, with my feet up, the curtain open and all the little birds are chirping about. It is good.
 I took up crocheting during our many stays at the hospital. People donated their extra yarn they no longer wanted and I went to work making a 'crazy crochet blanket' for each child. I started with my oldest, knowing he was the first one nearing the 'leave the nest' stage of life. You can see those pictures from the posts above.


 For the 'crazy' project, I choose whichever colors I desired, to use for each blanket.  My second born and first born simply got a lovely mix of what looked good, since there were not many blues, (their favorite), but they still loved the earthy, guy colors.









  I knew, full well,  my third son, Ninja Boy, would desire a more red featured blanket, as it is his favorite color.



Then came my damsel, who received the girly, pink waves of candy like goodness.


                                      



 Then, there was the granny, crazy blanket....remember, all of this was the generous donations of people.






I, like many crocheters, love to have those 'easy, brainless' projects going. All of the above were simple single or double crochet stitiches. The kind that is relaxing, requires little thought, but exudes the pleasure of hooking stitches, getting all the benefits of creating something beautiful, while hanging with one's man or some similar endeavor. 


Now, like every winter, the fiber and crochet hooks call my name. This time, unlike times in the past, I will embark on a new idea..one that allowed me to pick out the very colors "I" like, by choice, completely, just for "ME"...for my taste, my earthy tone loving taste...oh, I am soooo excited!!

Now, here is my inspiration to whom I must give credit. Lucy at Attic 24. Although, I can safely say that I have likely been crocheting long before she ever picked it up, I found her blog back around the time B was first diagnosed, and so very much enjoyed her colorful, time consuming posts. It was always hit and miss with me, as I rarely have time to set and read blogs, but I tried a few fun projects that I likely would not have attempted without her inspiration. In addition, with all we were going through, I lost interest in crocheting for a bit and her blog, even if only once in a while. 
Well, I just so happen to check on her again, after a long absence and was please to see a new twist on a simple, brainless crochet blanket and I got all excited! I have never used so many colors, without it being a crazy blanket, of my own choosing, and this twist makes it a bit more interesting, although still easy. So, here's to a new twist on an old story for me. Thanks to Lucy and all the time she devoted to sharing it with me (us).  Wait until you see all of the color on her blog!!

Now, I will wet your appetite with pictures of the lovely colors that I have chosen. This blanket has been the most 'prep' I have ever done for a blanket. That is, thanks to Lucy. I will tell you more about that in my next post.

***THIS JUST IN....you and me and some of our friends, are joinging in, more locally, on this fun crochet story together, with the intention of working together in cyber fasion, sharing lots of good pictures and lots of fun awing and oowwing over all the fiber goodness. Do not be overwhelmed by Lucy's blog, I will show you what to do here as an America version. There are lots of choices.



You see, I love purples and I love earth tones...very much. I am very happy with this grouping of colors.
I hope to put better pictures here tomorrow.






So, for me, I decided NOT to order the yarn from the wool shop in England. (on Lucy's blog) I might someday, but this time I decided to go to my local craft store, where they had a lovely, set of acrylic yarn, on sale, very soft, with a large variety of juicy, good colors to choose from. These balls of yarn are twice the size needed in Lucy's pattern, but I knew I would use them anyway, plus, I am going to make a larger blanket than twin size.
As much as I would love to use a natural, wool fiber, it was not cost effective for me at this time, for this project. There are very lovely synthetic yarns out there nowadays.
So, be sure to go pick out your favorite colors, or use up your stash, or use less colors if you like, ok?
Stay tuned for more from this journey and encouragment on this project.

Friday, March 23, 2012

plugging along

This week has gone quite well so far.  Braveheart is feeling much better, especially toward the beginning of the week.  Today and yesterday he is more sleepy.  We notice little things like suddenly he is taking 3-5 pills in one gulp like he used to.  The other day before it got a bit gloomy out, we noticed him taking his walk down our street with his sister.  He just looked and walked kinda normal, does that make sense?  I know that seems weird, but it's those kind of things that one sees sometimes.  I am (we are) so excited for him to continue to get better.

The big news this week is that we have our CT scan on Monday, so we are just trusting the Lord on this one. No one suspects much for this 6 month out scan.  I may not be so calm for the year out one.  I feel like we have come so far you know?  Are we on a turning point?  There will be lots of fluids involved with this.  They are going to help him with that.  We will be there all day long. 

Thank you for your believing prayers.  Sometimes you wonder if you are 'toiling in vein' but God sends His word which is so good...

Isaiah 49

 1 Listen to Me, O Islands,
And pay attention, you peoples from afar.

The LORD called Me from the womb;
From the body of My mother He named Me.
2 He has made My mouth like a sharp sword,
In the shadow of His hand He has concealed Me;
And He has also made Me a select arrow,
He has hidden Me in His quiver.
3 He said to Me, “You are My Servant, Israel,

In Whom I will show My glory.”
4 But I said, “I have toiled in vain,
I have spent My strength for nothing and vanity;
Yet surely the justice due to Me is with the LORD,
And My reward with My God.”



Thursday, February 23, 2012

doin' so good!!!!

Braveheart is doing so well I am floating on clouds.  I was even able to meet with a mom and fellow DM friend and visit.  I encouraged the young DMer in her continuing crochet endeavors.  I taught the young onc mom how to start her first chain.  It was wonderful.  I love the interest being shown by young people for these arts.  Feeling blessed today.  I now want to start a cowl, they are so in.  I need to finish two hats a keep working on a cool scarf I am working on.


Tuesday, February 21, 2012

you can walk through the cloud of sad

There is a young teen girl here who is in her last days.  I have met her, while we were here for transplant in the fall.  Very nice family.  I remember the father the best as he was here the most at the same time as me anyway.  I talked with him occasionally, but do not know them super well.  Can't remember what type of cancer she has, but that she has had an amputation, I am quite sure.  I can picture her, where I introduced myself but I cannot see her facial features clearly. I don't like that. 

As I walk past the room, one can split the malaise, the sadness with a knife.  It is like a cloud one flies through in the sky but here in this hall and it is emotions. Loss.
 Even though I am covered, even though I have supernaturally been able to go on without internalizing these sad events while I care for my own recovering son, I am overwhelmed as I walk by and my heart wrenches and tears fill my lids.  I pray for them.  I offer my prayers. 
I hate cancer and I confess, in a quick flash of thought, that I hope that is not ever our family...

This is part of our life now. I am not depressed as I write this, but I will not ignore each death.  I will pray for the families. I will give honor to the one who is leaving us.  As much as I am able I will not let each little precious life be forgotten.  I am available if the Lord gives any opportunity to encourage them.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

5 months..I know..crazy right?

It has now been 5 months since Braveheart's transplant.  This is a great milestone! I haven't been here this last week due to extreme busyness.  I still have to take him to clinic at least once a week.  The other children have many papers due, places to go.  He has been feeling better.  I am filled with joy during these times.  I feel like a little 'normal' is about.  I push away the other thoughts that try to slip in. I try to enjoy the 'believing' thought that we did this...he is healed...no more bad cancer forever!! God is giving me tremendous peace.  I enjoy the feeling I sometimes get of complete relief.  I feel like I will never be 'afraid' again. 

****When God is for us, what can cancer do?

We are thankful for the many blessings and answered prayers.  I am glad that faith is about holding tight to it when the storm comes.  What is faith if you believe that it is only real if your life is perfect?  Life is hard.  Bad things happen.  With that being said, I believe God's word though and he is a GOD OF IMPOSSIBILITIES and he made me to want my son to live...Praise God!  That is how he makes a mama! SO I will pray in His will that he may live, thrive, heal and show them just how amazing He is!



Wednesday, January 25, 2012

the simple things

I haven't thought that much about getting out of the shower..so to speak..but I had to share a strange joy I felt last night after Bryce finished his bath.  He has had a pretty good week, considering.  Along with daily battles on this road, just to see him leave the bathroom with his jammies on, his hair looking long and sweet and curlie, his cheeks squeaky clean and chuncky from the steroids..but he had the biggest smile...he looked so clean, bright and handsome...I am rejoicing in this precious moment in the hall, talking, laughing with him and touching his sweet, soft hair.  Soooo very thankful....

Monday, December 19, 2011

DAY 100!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, this is DAY 100 post transplant!  This is, by no means, the end of his journey nor is BRAVEHEART completely out of the woods yet, but this is a huge milestone in progress.  
Thank you Jesus!!!

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Day 37

I happen to know that we have been here for a long time now.  Since Sept. 1st.  I think we're hanging in there ok. Some days it does take it's toll though.  Especially during certain hormonal explosion times.  Mostly you nurses here are just great, but boy do you hold some power over how we feel here. Some just don't click with us or respect me as the parent and seem like you are still in 'high school' in your attitude.  Thankfully, that is rare.  Thankfully the Lord is my portion and my rock.  I will show the love of Christ and not be brought down by these little bumps in the road for long.  Amen.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Day 29

Today is day 29 post transplant.  We have been through the ringer and back.  Have you ever thought your child might be facing death...soon?  It's a disheartening feeling.  It is a surefire way to learn to pray better.  We have turned a corner in his healing.  We have a long way to go but we are heading in the right direction and we are seeing many prayers answered.  Whilst he is sleeping, I just stepped outside into a beautiful 80 degree sunny day with a lovely breeze.  My current world.  I need to be out here, to feel the sun on my face.  I find bits of green intermixed with shiny architectural shapes of buildings 8 stories high.  Breezes are just always better when you are next to trees.  I am unable to think of what I will do when I get home.  I am only here, in the now, in this moment.  Praising God for victories along the way......

Monday, September 12, 2011

day 1

Yesterday was Day 0.  The actual transplant day.  It went very well.  Anticlimactic.  Counts have dropped.  Joy abounds. Peace.  The siblings were able to be here.  This is good so that they can have some kind of connection.  We had food and it was good.  Now we pray as he enters the hardest part.  It's weird because he has to have this plethora of IV meds to protect and manage his system while he has no counts and to keep his body from rejecting the cells and yet that is what starts to make him feel worse and cause it's own set of symptoms.

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Why MAGNANIMOUS?

Noah Webster's 1828 Dictionary of the American Language defines Magnanimity as such:
MAGNANIM'ITY, n. [L. magnanimitas; magnus, great, and animus, mind.] Greatness of mind; that elevation or dignity of soul, which encounters danger and trouble with tranquillity and firmness, which raises the possessor above revenge, and makes him delight in acts of benevolence, which makes him disdain injustice and meanness, and prompts him to sacrifice personal ease, interest and safety for the accomplishment of useful and noble objects.