strawberries and cream...yuuum...

I am eating some strawberries with home made cream on top, sprinkled with stevia.  Very tasty.  Should I give up coffee?  It is not good for adrenals that are fatigued, but I am scared of the withdrawals.  Also, how will I eat well at the hospital for the next two days...I am so weak...

children growing in grace

First I want to say that good bye to dear Brittany who left our world yesterday.  I was able to say good bye to her family as the Lord always put them in my path in what had to be a supernatural way even for being at the same hospital.  I pray for those dear sweet parents for their loss. I think she had siblings too.

Now I must mention that Secret Agent Boy, child and boy number 3#, loves snowboarding.  He finally got to use his free pass and you guessed it, he was going down a hill with friends and fell, landing right on his right wrist.  He has a Colles' Fracture and he got both the radial and the ulnar bone.  He has a temporary splint cast on and we will see the Ortho Surgeon next week.  From there we will see what they want to do.

 He is so brave. Let me tell you, this is the kid who is afraid of shots, needles, medical anything...seriously.  He panics.  I am so thankful for the strong faith I saw come out of my precious boy.  He trusted the Lord, he grew in strength, he said things that were so gracious.  He even cared more about praying for his brother to be healed.  One comment he made, after thinking for a bit, it suddenly hit him.."awe mom, you have enough to worry about, now you will have to worry about me now too."  Now, how precious is that?  I told him I am happy to worry over him because I love him.  I am feeling privileged to be able to show him devoted care that he saw B get all these years.

Green Aid:

Although I have been juicing off and on for the last year, I was really off during transplant, so here I am trying to juice and gearing up for a fast for a day or maybe a weekend, we'll see.  Anyway, Green Aid is very tasty. From Cherie's book.  I changed a few things but having fun following some simple recipes rather than just throwing it all in as I often do.

2  organic apples
1 lemon, no skin
large handful celery
small clip of last of cilantro
1/4 cranberries
small chunk ginger
1 garlic

Gave some to the Agent to drink to help heal his arm in general.  I will be looking into things to help him to add to his diet.  I know that Comfrey is a good one.

This tasted very good above, need less lemon, so had to add water and stevia, then it was soooo good!

Happy juicing and healing!

doin' so good!!!!

Braveheart is doing so well I am floating on clouds.  I was even able to meet with a mom and fellow DM friend and visit.  I encouraged the young DMer in her continuing crochet endeavors.  I taught the young onc mom how to start her first chain.  It was wonderful.  I love the interest being shown by young people for these arts.  Feeling blessed today.  I now want to start a cowl, they are so in.  I need to finish two hats a keep working on a cool scarf I am working on.

you can walk through the cloud of sad

There is a young teen girl here who is in her last days.  I have met her, while we were here for transplant in the fall.  Very nice family.  I remember the father the best as he was here the most at the same time as me anyway.  I talked with him occasionally, but do not know them super well.  Can't remember what type of cancer she has, but that she has had an amputation, I am quite sure.  I can picture her, where I introduced myself but I cannot see her facial features clearly. I don't like that. 

As I walk past the room, one can split the malaise, the sadness with a knife.  It is like a cloud one flies through in the sky but here in this hall and it is emotions. Loss.
 Even though I am covered, even though I have supernaturally been able to go on without internalizing these sad events while I care for my own recovering son, I am overwhelmed as I walk by and my heart wrenches and tears fill my lids.  I pray for them.  I offer my prayers. 
I hate cancer and I confess, in a quick flash of thought, that I hope that is not ever our family...

This is part of our life now. I am not depressed as I write this, but I will not ignore each death.  I will pray for the families. I will give honor to the one who is leaving us.  As much as I am able I will not let each little precious life be forgotten.  I am available if the Lord gives any opportunity to encourage them.

5 months..I know..crazy right?

It has now been 5 months since Braveheart's transplant.  This is a great milestone! I haven't been here this last week due to extreme busyness.  I still have to take him to clinic at least once a week.  The other children have many papers due, places to go.  He has been feeling better.  I am filled with joy during these times.  I feel like a little 'normal' is about.  I push away the other thoughts that try to slip in. I try to enjoy the 'believing' thought that we did this...he is healed...no more bad cancer forever!! God is giving me tremendous peace.  I enjoy the feeling I sometimes get of complete relief.  I feel like I will never be 'afraid' again. 

****When God is for us, what can cancer do?

We are thankful for the many blessings and answered prayers.  I am glad that faith is about holding tight to it when the storm comes.  What is faith if you believe that it is only real if your life is perfect?  Life is hard.  Bad things happen.  With that being said, I believe God's word though and he is a GOD OF IMPOSSIBILITIES and he made me to want my son to live...Praise God!  That is how he makes a mama! SO I will pray in His will that he may live, thrive, heal and show them just how amazing He is!